Day 1: "If you can get past the look of the stuff . . . "

Good evening, friends! My first day as a bona fide NutriSystem gourmet is drawing to a close. And while today's menu was not particularly sophisticated . . . or pretty . . . it was not bad. Not bad at all. If I can conquer the inherent weirdness of selecting all my meals from giant, color-coded cardboard boxes lined up in my kitchen -- I might just be on the road to Late Night Nutrisystem Infomercial Success Story! Sigh . . . I've always wanted to be a star . .

Ok, so lets cut right to the stuff I know you guys are most interested in: the food. Honestly, documenting the meals has been my favorite part of doing this so far -- its kind of like an edible arts and crafts experiment. So to begin at the beginning:


Breakfast

The most important meal of the day! Today's consisted of:
Nutrisystem Berries & Multigrain Flakes cereal with 1/2 c. of skim milk
A nectarine
Coffee with skim milk

Cereal in its "raw" form . . . please to add milk.



Don't let its slightly suspicious pink hue frighten you, kids! Rainbow cereals are always fun!

Now granted, it is very hard to eff up cereal. Unless you shred pieces of old cereal boxes and cure them with craft glue . . . cereal is cereal. And as a carb lover, I have been known to treat a bowl of Cheerios like an ice cream sundae. So this was a delightful start to the morning -- crispy and granola like, with a surprisingly authentic "berry" flavor. Not Cinnamon Toast Crunch by any stretch of the imagination . . . but it was sweet and filling, which is what I look for in a Lets Start The Day meal. Yes! I'm pumped.


Lunch

I selected my lunch entree by literally closing my eyes and reaching into the "Lunch" box in the corner of my kitchen . . . who doesn't love surprises? Today's lucky prize:
Nutrisystem Pasta Parmesan with Broccoli
A salad with lean turkey breast and fat free dressing


A feast fit for a King . . . a very laid-back King who enjoys novelty food items and microwaves . . .

A normal lunch for me would have consisted of that salad alone, so the addition of this yummy pasta cup was exciting. Now, don't let these next images frighten you. I will state up front that this was pretty good . . . perhaps more of a "soup" than simply "pasta in sauce" . . . but that could be because I added too much water. Hey, I didn't say I was a particularly skilled Nutri-Gourmet. Give me time.



Its green-ness is what makes it scary, I think. But my dining companion Chelsee said, "It smells pretty good . . ." She might have been trying to be nice, though.

The great thing about these strange little meals, though, is that they are surprisingly filling. I'm beginning to suspect they contain some sort of drug / appetite supressant -- and Mama G. agrees. She had a "peanut butter crisp" meal bar and a salad for lunch and was able to wrangle small children for the rest of the afternoon without trouble! Magic, I say!! But yes, my bowl of green soupy noodles kept me satisfied until my mid afternoon yogurt and pear snack . .. which I did not take a picture of, because you've all seen yogurt and pears.

Dinner

I won't lie, though -- I was pretty hungry by the time I got home from a long day in the cube. It was kinda nice (in a weird, robots-of-the-future sort of way) to not have to try to come up with some sort of dinner based on the random ingredients of my fridge -- which is not always an easy or successful task. Instead, I dug around in the Dinner Box and came up with this feast:
Nutrisystem Lemon Butter Sauce with Chicken and Noodles
1/2 c. cooked broccoli
1/2 c. cooked cauliflower
salad

Behold!


Dinner in its "natural" state



Mmm! Don't be scared of its brown-ness! I added the broccoli and cauliflower to soak up the sauce, which was again, believe it or not, pretty decent!



If it weren't for the box in the back there, you could almost believe some 1950's housewife whipped up this wholesome and well balanced meal with her new electric range and Frigidaire! Biiilly! Suusie! Dinnertime!


The thing that made me the most nervous about this meal was the "chicken". What kind of insane journey had this substance undergone to go from the factory farm to my plate? I was bracing myself for the typical frozen dinner cubes of gelatinous faux meat-product . . . but folks, I kid you not -- this was real chicken. Well, as real as chicken from a box in the corner of my kitchen can be . . . but still. My mind was kind of blown. How did they get it so moist and . . . chicken-like? It was like Crock-pot chicken . . . or, perhaps more accurately, a much more quality form of the chicken you find those Hearty canned soups. Canned chicken. Who knew.

So what better way to close out a long and exciting day of dietary adventures than with a little . .

Dessert!!

Behold! Broooowniiiie!


Now, honestly -- when it comes to chocolate, I'm not picky! Chocolate anything is fine by me ... from cheap choco-easter bunnies to the most decadent of gourmet chocolate desserts. Still, as I fished this brownie out of the Dessert box, my expectations were low. Especially when the real article looked like this:



A chalkboard eraser? A tar-y brick of chewing tobacco? I approached with caution, and took my frist tentative nibble . . .

And it was amazing.

Seriously -- this is like a Little Debbie Brownie from my elementary school golden days, minus the little sprinkling of walnuts on top. Moisty, chewing, and oooohhh so chocolatey! No weird diet-chemical aftertaste. And, miracle of miracles . . . I am STUFFED!! There's no doubt in my mind there is some sort of magic drug in this food . .. but hell, I'll take it! Mama G's comment to me today was . . . "I'm finding it hard to believe that you can lose weight eating this stuff. It might look kind of gross, but it tastes pretty damn good."

Could Mama and I be sharing some sort of food-induced mind-trip? If I start tithe-ing part of my yearly salary to the good people at Nutrisystem . . . someone please help me. Until then, though -- stand aside while I dig around in my Magic Food Box!

Until tomorrow folks!